Half way to fifty…
If you haven’t already guessed, I recently turned 25. Despite trying so hard to stay closer to 20 than 30 it was inevitable, and just like the New Year’s resolutions that I fail to uphold every year, I think of birthdays as a chance for self-improvement over the coming year.
For this year’s goals I’ve tried to look on the broader spectrum that could encompass a number of things, rather than super specific goals like “lose weight” or “eat healthy” (I do need start to do more of the latter of but let’s ignore that for now…)
1. Feel the fear and do it anyway
I first heard this piece of advice listening to a podcast with Jera Foster-Fell, one of my favourite Instagram influencers at the moment. Too often I find myself saying no because I’m scared of either failing, getting hurt, or avoiding the anxious feeling the situation creates. But I also think that if it makes you uncomfortable, do it. If it scares you, do it. So that’s how I’m approaching life this year, otherwise I’ll never grasp new opportunities to grow. And besides, being courageous isn’t about not feeling fear at all, it’s about -coming full circle here- feeling the fear and doing it anyway.
2. Happiness first
As someone who’s battled with an anxiety disorder, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, for almost 14 years now (time flies), I’ve been finding myself spiralling and getting into low states more often recently. To me, prioritising happiness means that I’ll do things and surround myself with people who contribute positively to my mental health, not holding on to toxic friendships, or continuously doing things that I know are making me feel pretty shitty about myself.
3. Feed the soul
I’ve always had a bad relationship with food. I binge, I feel guilty, I feel motivated to change, I get into a low state or stress, and I binge again. Instead of sitting here and saying “I’m going to eat so healthy this year!” knowing full well that’ll last a couple of weeks at most, I’m choosing to say that I’m going to try to fuel my body and soul with what feels right at the time and not hold myself to unrealistic expectations and restricting food I love. I think this could be the way that I build a good relationship with food, along with having my personal trainer hold me accountable and keeping me motivated (she’s a star).
4. Build better habits
This is kind of an umbrella for a range of things. From limiting phone screen time and avoiding getting stuck into blackholes of social media scrolling, to taking up meditation a few times a week and dedicating more time to my hobbies and interests, I need to start doing these things more often so they become a habit within my daily routine. I hope that in doing so I’ll be working towards goals 2 and 3 as well, contributing to my overall happiness and feeding the soul with these better, healthier habits.
5. Be comfortable with doing things alone
We’re all guilty of not going to watch a film we want to see or not eating out just because none of our friends want to do it. Getting over the anxious feeling of going out alone and not feeling judged or embarrassed is something I definitely need to work on seen as I’m –dare I say it– a grown adult.
…okay maybe I’m not ready to be a full adult yet but still! I’m sick of missing out on life (a bit dramatic) because I’m too afraid to be content with my own company in public.
6. Stop ruminating about the future
Uni lost my exam paper? No worries they’ll find it.
Car broke down in the middle of the Peaks? Eh it’s a story to tell.
I’m a pretty chill person when it comes to the little stressors in life, you know, the ones that aren’t life threatening or about money. But when it comes to uncertainties, that’s when I start to worry. Recently I’ve found myself ruminating more and more about the future, over aspects that I either can’t control or shouldn’t even be thinking about just yet. Constant worrying can affect your mental health and prevent you from enjoying the chapter of your life that you’re in right now. It happens so easily and it’s hard to stop once you start to spiral, but I think meditating and practicing gratitude for the present will help massively.
So there’s a couple of things I want to work on in my 25th year on earth. Notice how for once I didn’t say I was going to start blogging again and more often? Because we all know how that will go…
As you were